What do you do when your ex is bad mouth?
The best way to respond to bad-mouthing is to behave in ways that make you feel good about yourself….Don’t expect them to ever change their behavior, and do develop strategies for deflecting their drama.
- Don’t defend yourself.
- Use disarming statements.
- Don’t match your ex’s intensity.
What to do when your ex is saying bad things about you?
Urge people to contact you directly if they have a question or concerns. Don’t get emotional. It’s natural to feel angry and upset when people say bad things about us. But if you comer across as volatile or capable of whatever your ex is saying about you, then people may believe what they’ve heard.
What to do when your ex is bad mouthing your child?
If your ex counters by slinging more barbs, hold your boundaries and don’t respond. There are some situations where you may need to confront the bad-mouthing: your child’s school staff or doctors have been told you don’t have custody, and other parents are declining playdate invitations because they’ve been told you’re evil.
What to do if your ex is trying to control your kids?
Your ex is trying to control what your kids think, so give them permission to think for themselves. Tell them to talk to you directly if they have concerns about you. Don’t pressure them to believe your side of the story; instead, let them know they have a right to their own feelings and opinions.
Why do some people blame their exes for everything?
Although most divorced people occasionally say something less than kind about their former spouse, some turn ex-bashing into an Olympic event. These are usually high-conflict individuals (HCIs) who defend against the pain of divorce by blaming their ex for everything. HCIs have distorted ways of thinking, and cannot see their part in problems.