Is it always better to forgive and forget?

Is it always better to forgive and forget?

Forgiving and forgetting is great in theory, but in reality it’s difficult. Below are four reasons why it’s important to forgive but not forget. Forgiving is critical to our emotional health. By refusing to forgive someone, we’re choosing to hold on to all the anger and bitterness that their actions have created.

Why is it hard to forgive and forget?

When someone does something that hurts us it can trigger older, deeper pains. Without realising it we can engage in the ‘snowball affect’. We unconsciously layer the new hurt to the old hurt, until we are facing something too big and overwhelming to forgive and forget.

Is it okay to forgive but not forget?

It’s good for you to let go of your anger and forgive, but forgetting isn’t required or even necessarily healthy. When it comes to long-standing relationships, forgiveness is an integral part of communing, of experiencing deeper intimacy and of showing love (and acceptance.)

Can you forgive someone and still not want to be around them?

You can forgive someone for abandoning you in a time of need, for walking away, for not putting you first, for letting you go. But that doesn’t mean you trust that person again. Forgiveness doesn’t mean you keep a close friendship with the person who betrayed you.

Does forgiving mean forgetting?

What do forgiveness and forgetting really mean? According to the Oxford Dictionary, the number one definition for forgiveness is to “stop feeling angry or resentful towards (someone) for an offense, flaw, or mistake.” And to forget is to: “fail to remember.”

What does the Bible say about forgiving what you can’t forget?

The Bible teaches us much about forgiveness, and all of it is the opposite of “forgive and forget.” In Matthew 6:14-15, “For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.”

Why is forgiving difficult?

Forgiveness is difficult in part because evolution has endowed us with the psychological motivation to avoid being exploited by others, and one of the easiest ways to prevent exploitation is to hit back or simply avoid the exploiter.

Can you forgive and forget in a relationship?

This enlightening theory supports the emotional correlation between forgiving and forgetting as when one is trying to forgive — yet can’t forget the feelings of love that were once there, and now anger or hurt has replaced that love — “The rumination that comes with resentment keeps reinforcing the memory from the past …

Can you forgive and still be hurt?

Originally Answered: Can you forgive someone and still be hurt? Of course you can. Just because you forgive doesn’t mean your feelings are invalid or that they just stop. It means you stop holding it against them.

Is it OK to never forgive someone?

Don’t say you forgive someone when you don’t. It won’t make you feel better, and it won’t make your life easier. On the contrary, it is not about making your life easier when someone asks you to forgive. The purpose behind the question of forgiving is to make the person asking the question feel better.

What God says about forgive and forget?

In Matthew 6:14-15, “For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.”

What is the problem with forgiveness and forgetting?

The problem with forgiving and forgetting is that people often forget first, and then forget to forgive. People who forgive and forget are able to bypass the “dirty-work” — the internal and external discussions that have to take place in order to confront an uncomfortable feeling and work through it.

Should we forgive and forget our sins?

However, if by “forgive and forget” one means, “I will act as if the sin had never occurred and live as if I don’t remember it,” then we can run into trouble. For example, a rape victim can choose to forgive the rapist, but that does not mean she should act as if that sin had never happened.

What are some things you don’t trust about forgiveness?

8) You don’t trust that if you forgive someone they will forgive you back. Forgiveness is not a guaranteed two-way street. Often, by letting go of something, we do naturally affect others around us, but sometimes it doesn’t work that way.

Why is it so hard for some people to forget?

For some people, it’s just too hard to forget about something when it hurt them. While this is understandable, it can really throw a wrench into someone when they really do want to forget. So before you tell this person you forgive them and will forget about it, just make sure you can really forget it.